Oh, the places you'll go!

Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!


You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own. And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

My baby turned one yesterday.

My sweet, tiny baby who was 6 lbs. 11 oz. that would sleep so soundly on my chest is now a toddler running around squealing and screaming with shouts of pure joy and excitment.

That was fast. 

I always knew it would go by quickly but here I am, post first birthday wondering how did that happen? 

My husband and I went out birthday shopping to target a few days ago, while little man was with Grandma. After we had looked at the toys and clothes, I wandered over to the book section. I always seem to find myself there. Books have always been a love of mine. Something completely consistent in an utterly inconsistent and sometimes disappointing world. Anyways, I love giving books as gifts. There is something personal and special about giving a wonderful story to someone. Makes my heart feel all warm and fuzzy just thinking about it. Well, I happened upon one of my most favorite books. Oh, the places you'll go by Dr. Suess. It is traditionally given to kids when they graduate but I picked it up and started reading it. If you have never actually read it, it's basically in a nut shell about life and all of what it is made out of. That the reader can go anywhere, be anything and do anything he wants with it. I immediately started thinking about Kai and how his whole life was ahead of him.

He has only been on this earth for one year and already he has brought so much love, happiness and joy to so many people. What a blessing he is!

I am so excited to see what his passions will be, what kind of friends he will have, where he will travel, what his favorite color will be, what his greatest fear will be or what kind of son, husband, father, or friend he will become. 

I hope his life is full wonder. I hope he finds a great love. I hope he will find true happiness.

Motherhood is so beautiful. But it is also painful. It is hard to love someone that much. Every mother will agree, you pour every ounce of energy, time, patience, and love into that other person only for them to grow up and leave. And that is the point. To mold them into responsible, moral, kind members of society. To raise them to where they no longer need you. It is bittersweet, but it is life. 

So I have decided not to rush anymore milestones, to put away any distraction, and to completely submerge myself in every moment with my son. Before I know it, I will be watching my baby bird fly away and create a life for himself. Oh, the places he will go!

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!


So...
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
You're off the Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!

A Leap of Faith

If I had to summarize the past two years of my life in one sentence, "A leap of faith" would be it. Actually the title of this blog is inaccurate. It is really more like several leaps of faith but it just doesn't sounds as good.

      I began skydiving in March of 2008. Unlike most stories of how people became hooked on the sport, my story was NOT love at first leap. Don't get me wrong, my first jump was amazing, breathtaking and unlike anything I had ever experienced but I was perfectly fine with beginning and ending my skydiving career with one jump. After being beat over the head with the idea of going through the AFF course so we could jump on our own, by two of my nearest and dearest friends (Thank you Brett and Yumi), I finally obliged and the rest was history. I think my passion for the sport grew more like a mature romance rather than a case of puppy love, it took time. Looking back, I find it hilarious that I knowingly threw myself out of planes without really being convinced that this was something I wanted to do. But I love a challenge and I am stubborn when I get an idea in my head. So I kept jumping, making leaps of faith, if you will. After investing almost all my time, energy and money, I fell in love with skydiving and I fell hard. It was one of the best times of my life. I was pretty much flat broke but so immensely happy. It was my escape and the most relaxing thing I had ever done for myself. It forever changed me.

    Fast Forward to the end of November 2008, along with jumping out of planes another passion was born through this part of my life. Indoor skydiving, tunnel flying, wind tunnels, whatever you know it as, it was and still is like a drug to me. And this is where my skydiving story turns into a romance novel. This is the part where I meet the man who becomes my Husband. He was an instructor at the wind tunnel in Orlando and I was a fairly regular flyer there. We meet. Sparks fly. And again the rest is history. We dated for 4 months then got married. So many people thought we were crazy, it was too soon, we barely knew each other, too young to take such a leap of faith..... the list continues. The way I see it is like this: When you find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. Good ol' When Harry met Sally. We knew, we just knew. Sure we could have waited and had a long engagement and had everything in a straight line but that is just not our style. I always knew that I would live my life differently, so did Jesse. We made a leap of faith, together, hands held, eyes closed, hearts open. It was the best decision either of us had ever made.

   Fast forward yet again, Jesse joins the Army with the small hope/chance that he will one day become a Golden Knight for the U.S. Parachute team and I am pregnant. Living a different life now turns into living a different/ difficult life. It was definitely not easy, it was actually quite hard but not impossible. We kept going, unsure what the future held. Holding on to the faith that we had made the right choices and that what was meant to be would be. Ten days after Jesse returned home from 7 months of training, our beautiful son was born. Again, we leaped but this time into parenthood. It has been the single greatest thing I have ever done. Ever.

    So here we are now, Jesse is now officially a Golden Knight, we have a precious son who will be one soon, our marriage is strong and joyful, we have a beautiful home and we are happy. We are living proof that Leaps of Faith can be and will be life changing in the most amazing ways. Its just a matter of having the courage to step into the unknown, letting yourself feel vulnerable and continuing to let life mold and change you into what you are meant to be.